So, I'm alone again.
This is nice, quiet.
No one stays,
Even when I though they would.
Nay, you will be back to watch me die.
No? Really?
Who knows, you won't want to miss this.
Me being helpless, weak.
They always come back for it.
Being alone, I should get used to this.
Maybe if I'm in it for long enough,
I will lose my ability to feel.
Now that's a good idea,
I really should keep that in mind.
I would give anything
To not feel.
Tell me something,
Was it worth it, telling you?
Did you understand it?
No?
Yeah, guess I figured that out.
It took me that much to get it out.
Well, obviously you didn't care.
It's not your fault
And I don't blame you.
Come to think of it,
Maybe I should blame someone
And I know who to blame.
I don't know where I stand.
Maybe I belong in the skies?
Maybe in the swamp?
Do I ever deserved to know?
I don't know.
I am desperate to prove myself
But I am no longer sure to who.
Maybe I'm trying to prove to myself that I am worth something to someone.
Or maybe I was trying to prove that..
Up to this point, I am not even sure what I am.
Have you had those blurry moments
Where everything sort of fades?
Yeah, right now,
My lines, my words, my life,
They are slowly blurring, fading.
They say when life gives you lemons,
You make lemonade.
Well, my lemonade taste awful.
They say God has a plan and He protects.
Well, Lord,
You obviously forgot about me
Because I am still hurting and lost
And nothing ever happens no matter how damn hard I pray.
On second thought, God,
Let me hurt.
Maybe if I hurt long enough,
I will be immune to it and
Nothing, no one can hurt me anymore,
Or rather, I can get used to hurting all the time.
Well, it doesn't hurt to have a back up plan.
\
One day, I will be able to look up in the sky and be an illusion, a clear memory.
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