Little things: Kindness

Meet Jason Kam.

I met him during the Swedish House Mafia Concert.

Why does he have a post?

Because I don't ever want to forget why I enjoyed this concert 

and how he made me feel less alone during the entire concert.

Like I've said, I met him at the concert.

He was standing beside me and we talked.

He was the only person that I knew that was around me when the concert started.

They.. Well, we got separated

and they really.. didn't bother to pull me next to them. I guess.

They *I believe* think that I will be fine

because getting separated is not something you can avoid.

*breathe*

Wow, really?

You guys didn't even try to get me next to you.

Yeah, not a big deal.

Oh shit. Why did I bring this up?

And now, it hurts all over again.

*deep breathe*

Anyway, when the concert started, I was literally alone.

When I saw that he was still next to me,

I was secretly grateful. Like sincerely grateful.

He would randomly look at me and smile during the concert.

Sometimes, he would tap my shoulder and ask if I'm okay and vice versa.

I caught him looking at me a few times.

He was the person that I partied with during the whole concert.

I expected my best friend to be the one who I'll be shouting song lyrics with,

dancing and pointing at the sky with,

to jump up and down and stamp on each other toes with.

She was.. Occupied.

And no, it was him.

Halfway during the concert,

he told me that he'll be right back 'cause he had to look for his brother.

I couldn't say, "No, stay here!"

I nodded and shouted, "Okay!" over the music.

I really didn't expect him to come back.

I was sad to see him go. 

I remember telling myself,

if he's not back after two songs and if I am tired, I'll leave.

Like I've said, I didn't expect him to come back

but I still turned my head to check.

And to my surprise, he was already smuggling through the crowd

trying to get back to the spot next to me.

All I could think of was

"You came back for me."

I was sincerely happy to see him.

He was my companion for the concert

and he came back.

I expected him to leave or go to his friends but no.

He was next to me for the next 6 hours.

Near the end of the concert, I was honestly tired.

All I wanted to do is sleep.

I felt a tap on my shoulder.

I turned around and it was him.

He told me he was going to the toilet.

I really didn't want to be there alone and I needed water.

So, I left the party zone to buy water.

After going to the toilet, he came back, to me.

I am still confused why he stuck by me when there are better people to be around with.

Then, the concert was over.

Time to look for the people who really didn't care about where I was , LOL!

I would write out why they HAD to look for me

but I guess I'll never forget even if  I don't write it down.

I found my friends as he found his.

Of course, we walked with out friends.

Mine were a pair who were dating.

They were holding hands and stuff, which I don't mind.

But it's like they didn't even notice my existence.

They were engaged into their lovey-dovey conversation.

They only talked to me for the 5 secs because they needed water.

And then, I was left alone again.

I was walking beside them, or at least trying to.

But I had never felt so isolated.

And then, I stopped trying to make myself look like I am with them.

I just stopped trying entirely.

I lagged behind them, putting distance between us just because it's easier to focus on my own steps.

Left. Right. Left Right. Ouch, Loose Rock, Skip.

just because it hurts less not trying.

 I remember looking up, desperately trying to push away the pain, 

desperately trying not to feel.

I saw him looking back.

He was a few feet in front of my friends and he was searching, 

for me.

I knew that because when his eyes meet mine, he smiled.

He stepped to the side and waited for me to pass him.

When I did, he walked with me.

He said, "Follow me" and I obeyed.

Slowly, we pasted my friends and they followed us.

They were somehow really slow and we got separated.

But this time, I wasn't afraid of getting lost or anything 

 because he was with me.

It wasn't because I liked him or anything.

It was simply just because he was there when there wasn't anyone there

When I was with him, the pain left and I could breathe again.

He lead the road but he kept turning back to make sure that I was following him.

Then, to avoid him from straining his neck,

I held on to his shoulder.

He was okay with that, so I held on and never let go.

When my hand did slip off, he immediately turned his head over to see if I'm still there.

He guided me out of Sunway Lagoon, walked me out of the entrance.

My friends were gone.

My phone had no bars so I couldn't call them.

He offered to call for me even when his phone is low of battery.

My friends picked up, they sound so pissed off at me.

They literally growled "Where are you!?"

I guess they were sleepy? 

Hah, yeah.

He had to meet his friends but I couldn't find mine.

I didn't want to keep him from his friends

and I knew the place well enough to find the entrance

but he insisted on staying with me until I found my friends.

Of course, his friends called and he had to leave but

not without telling me where I had to go to find my friends.

He asked me for my number and I gave him a hug goodbye

while thanking him again and again for being there the entire night.

I really feel the need to treat him to dinner 

because I feel like I owe the whole night to him

and also I get to see him again.

He never gave me a straight answer why he stayed with me the entire time

but I am entirely grateful for him.

Of course, I found my friends and we went back to the room that I rented,

Yeah, the reason why they HAD to look for me, LOL

It hurt the whole time but because of Jason,

it didn't hurt as much. 

I was stupid to think back and write about this

because it's a record of what caused what I was trying not to feel

but because I didn't want to forget what Jason did,

I wrote this.

It broke me to remember the painful details because I don't forget.

I see the little details and I remember every single thing.

It breaks me to think and remember about it

but I will not forget the guy who never left me and made my night.

I prayed to God before the concert because I know already what I would get from my friends.

I said, "Dear God, in times like these, I pray for safety to, during and from this concert.

I am not very religious but I know God answered my prayers by giving my Jason for the night.

I thank Jason and I thank God.

Enough ranting now.

I hope there are more people like Jason in the world because they make the world the go round by just being there.

Even though, I wished I didn't go to the concert due to obvious reasons but I am grateful that I did when I think of him.

Thank you, Jason, if you're "lucky enough" to read this, which means that I have humiliated myself.

But, thank you for being there when no one else was there

and for making me remember the importance of the little things like such.